theonion: STANFORD, CA—Surmising that the animal was probably sick and most definitely filthy, Stanford University scientists warned Americans Monday to just stay away from that bird. “It’s doing a weird thing with its wings, and it just looks

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theonion: STANFORD, CA—Surmising that the animal was probably sick and most definitely filthy, Stanford University scientists warned Americans Monday to just stay away from that bird. “It’s doing a weird thing with its wings, and it just looks

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